Bullet to the Head: it’s not for bitches!

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Welcome to another random occasional film review where I disagree with somebody that dismissed a perfectly good film as shit!

Today’s review is crime/action thriller ‘Bullet to the Head’, a collaboration between action legend Sylvester Stallone and filmmaker legend Walter Hill that has recently arrived on DVD.

Before I cut to the meat, I’d like to wash over some facts I’d like to think are important to understand about the making of this film. It may not be groundbreaking and it may seem like your average hard-hitting action 80’s throwback, but you see, that’s what you need to expect in this case.

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Never has Sylvester Stallone worked with Walter Hill, the man that either wrote, directed or produced (or all three):

The Getaway, The Driver, Alien, The Warriors, 48 Hours, Brewsters Millions, Streets of Fire, Crossroads, Red Heat, Extreme Prejudice, Johnny Handsome, Trespass, Wild Bill, Last Man Standing, Deadwood and Prometheus.

Walter Hill hasn’t only worked with some of the most influential people in classic and modern cinema, he made them and he influenced them. James Remar got his first job through Hill, Schwarzenegger got one of the best films of his career from Hill, when the shit hits the fan, Ridley Scott counts on Walter Hill.

And yet the old rogue likes to make those small movies that can always beat a big budget bruiser to the ground any day of the week. It’s his forte. Ever since the Warriors made cult classic another name for money-maker, Hill has knocked out classic after classic, an extensive library of film spanning genres and decades… LIKE A BOSS!!!

It only made sense that after a long time away from the director’s chair, Hill would want to make a comeback with another king of comebacks and that man is the action legend he never ever worked with; Sly Stallone!

I’m not surprised if anyone that was aware of and appreciated this fact was pissing their pants with excitement and I don’t think those are the people that felt let down by Bullet in the Head as it didn’t particularly make waves at the cinema. Fuck that, who cares? Cinema is an exclusive bully that doesn’t favour the films it can’t market to a majority audience and Hill – being the stubborn old man he is and NOT needing to earn a living since the 80’s – didn’t give a shit who didn’t turn up.

Bullet to the Head is what comic book companies would call a One-Shot. It’s not intended to be a trilogy and it isn’t going to be a series, it’s a tidy package of well-executed classic gunplay, fighting, offensive dialoge and a story that won’t hurt your poor little head, nor leave your intelligence feeling insulted. That is what Hill specialises in; short and sweet and thrilling.

Bullet-to-the-Head-Image-2-e1359526975827Bullet… is based on a French graphic novel, ‘Du Plomb Dans La Tete’, written by Alexis Nolent, which explains Hill’s colourful and well-rounded style of direction, not to mention the return to one of his favourite places to film, Louisiana.

James Bonomo aka Jimmy Bobo (Stallone) is an old-school New Orleans mob hitman – jaded and hot tempered, regretful, bitter and discriminate and yet not without a sense of humour. He and his partner pull a hit on drugged up loser Hank Greely, who turns out to have once been a cop, also the former partner of Washington DC detective Taylor Kwon (Sung Kang).

When Bobo’s partner Louis is later murdered by hulking mercenary Keegan, who Bobo narrowly escapes, this brings detective Kwon looking for Bobo and yet with half the police force being corrupt and with ties to Keegan’s employer, an attempt is made on Kwon’s life before he is saved by Bobo, whose wing he is forced under out of self-preservation.

They set about trying to piece together the puzzle with mutual hate for each other. Bobo after all is responsible for the hit on Greely. But what’s humorous about Bullet is that the cop is a total dick, whereas Bobo is grumpy and gets upset a lot over his lack of manners. Enter Bobo’s estranged daughter, Lisa (Sara Shahi, nomnomnomnom)…

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It’s a tattooed girl thing you wouldn’t understand…

…and we get a slow burning narrative as to why Bobo is so burned out and regretful. It’s not Oscar material, what did you expect, you fucking snobs? In action films, a well-told story is all you really need. You don’t need to stop washing your hair and grow a curly moustache like Daniel Day Lewis to deliver a fucking script.

We then also get to see that Detective Kwon is so green and wet behind the ears that he’d better suit being a frog than a DC detective. Which is kinda funny when you think about it (Princess/Frog… Hottie/Douchebag). Plenty of laughs watching Stallone getting mad over Kang looking at his on-screen daughter the wrong way…

That’s the kind of dialogue and narrative I liked to see in Hill’s classics and with Allessandro Camon writing the script, and not Hill,  feel there’s hope for the future of witty action thrillers. Somebody out there can write a Walter Hill-style script. That makes me want to watch more films.

From the villains’ perspective, that’s where things aren’t so colourful except for Conan manimal Jason Momoa’s character Keegan, who reminded me of old James Remar and Sonny Landham psycho villains.

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Keegan is a merc looking to get to the top of the criminal underwold and make his money. As a seasoned combat veteran, working all over the world for whoever will pay him, he has the influence (lost of cannon fodder henchmen) and is unflinching in the face of death. On the paying side and looking at Jimmy Bobo and Detective Kwon as loose ends are Morel and Baptiste, a crime lord and corrupt lawyer.

It doesn’t take long for Bobo to make himself understood…

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Christian Slater as Baptiste, I feel, wasn’t completely into it. But then he hasn’t played anything with integrity since Heathers (or Kuffs hahaha). Adewale Akinnuoye-Agbaje however is straightforwardly slimy as greedy and somewhat naive crime lord Morel, who believes he is taking Keegan under his wing.

With that, this film rests on Stallone, Kang and Shahi doing their song and dance with some nifty action and drama scenes while Momoa manhandles people like I haven’t seen onscreen outside of wrestler Batista on WWE. The man is beasty, to be frank. And you wonder how the hell Stallone is going to deal with this shit, since his movie brawling opponents seem to get more extreme the older he gets.

Well without spoiling anything, the final half of the film lets rip with some jaw-dropping fast and hard as hell action. I’m not even kidding when I say I applaud some of the stuntmen for looking like they might have crippled themselves here and there. And of course…

WHAT ABOUT THE MOTHERFUCKING FIRE-AXE FIGHT???

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Lets get this straight, Momoa versus Stallone with axes (with Kang running around in a Die Hard vest, which was a bit cliched but who’s really arsed?). I had to rewind and watch from the beginning about five times just to believe my eyes because that was without a doubt one of the best face-offs with sharp heavy objects ever devoted to film. All I thought was HOW THE FUCK DID NOBODY LOSE AN ARM AND A LEG OR A HEAD?

Breathtaking…

Don’t knock this film until you’ve seen it, it’s not the best film there ever was but it’s effortless, slick and heavy hitting action with a comic slant and it’s really bloody well-made. Walter Hill may never make a flawless epic but he always knows how to tie a project together and this is almost identical to his classic fare, just so much better produced than they were back in the day.

And don’t believe your friends if they tell you it’s crap. A friend of mine, to his credit I guess, said that it was bad but in a good way. Well he might talk out of his arse but I’m used to the smell and I’m not afraid to have my own opinion. It’s awesome, despite the fact that it isn’t perfect. Who wants perfection anyway?!!

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What the Pieprzyć?!!

Just a few things I’d like to point out, to break away from the monotony of insulting morons…

Okay so I’m not promising that I won’t insult anybody but I’ll try not to, at least directly. So I’m trawling through Facebook for five minutes, very much aware that it’s not my attention span that’s the problem, it’s the complete lack of a sense of humour that seems to have become expected of the social network over the last couple of years.

Five minutes… it takes me FIVE. WHOLE. MINUTES. to completely lose my shit and want to go live a boring and productive life elsewhere rather than trying to be friendly with people. Maybe I’ll go pay taxes and then dying in a freak factory accident involving dropped trousers and a glue machine. I don’t care at this point. Socialising was clearly never designed for me. Bastards.

What annoys me so much about that place is the presumption of what is funny and what is acceptable, what is original and what is deemed unoriginal – usually everything after 5 minutes but NOT JUSTIN FUCKING BEIBER!!!

Myself being an artistic type with a runaway sense of humour (runaway as in, I often lack a sense of humour because it ran away), I like to come back from the same old boring shit that people find so entertaining and “LIKE” wholesale like those ‘KEEP CALM AND CARRY ON’ posters are the funniest most clever thing ever and that they mirror a time when all humanity achieved some great thing like making Hitler want to commit suicide….

Deep Breath…

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Secret: nobody laughed when I generated this…

But it’s okay, man… it’s all gravy!

I’m a bit more cutting edge than your average Facebook Hillbillies. Mostly because whereas it doesn’t take a lot to make me laugh, I’m not so easily offended and I appreciate a good reference.I also like things that are so stupid that you can’t help but laugh (even if just at me, fingers pointed and everything).

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I know, I only have Microsoft Paint, my editing skills leave shit to be desired.

I never realised how far that sets me apart from the crowd until I started giving up on people and entertaining myself. If it doesn’t entertain them at the same time, I’m fine, really. It’s just some friends saying, ‘your efforts to amuse are so hilarious, we broke the speed of sound whilst laughing, i.e. that’s why we didn’t sound like we were laughing, or slapping you across the face on a job well done!’

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I know, it was an old reference, even Mel Gibson didnt call me a cunt on Twitter for it and sadly Roger Ebert passed away immediately after. Not saying that it was my fault. It probably was but not for this picture. I criticised Ebert’s later work and also his new film critic staff, saying they were fucking useless. No doubt, I’m a film reviewer and I like to put up a fair fight, but fuck with me on film matters – regardless of your fame – and your name is Mud.

The film was GI Joe Retaliation. I might have overreacted. Okay, I totally overreacted. But that’s me. I don’t like film for effects, I like film for drama. My conscience is clear, he probably died without ever having read my Tweet anyway…

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BUT I MISS THIS GUY MORE!!!

Been reading the Huff Post a lot lately. They might be verging on the celebrity ridiculous but boy do they have the best image slideshows going?! Even the most ridiculous shit that happens in the US reminds me of how bland and pointless England can be, day after day. Especially when i see McDonalds suggesting that I take a dick up the arse!

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Like the one dollar whore that I so clearly am 😥

Fuck you, Ronny McD! Your fries arent even made from potato anymore. Even if they were, they’d have to come from Mexico on the back of pack mules and be washed in the blood of virgin illegal immigrants. Lets see you take a sausage “in yo but” when they throw you in Gitmo with Hamburglar for turning the world diabetic.

NOT EVEN BIN LADEN THOUGHT OF THAT ONE AND HE WAS ON FUCKIN KIDNEY DIALYSIS!

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Me personally, I prefer a more direct approach to killing people with sadistic cuteness!

Well…

If I reall had the choice…

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As a man who loves his food, I’m more about the KFC. I’m choosy. McDonalds is all about the fake flavouring (yes, KFC just sticks to good ole fashioned Monosodium Glutamate goodness), Burger King is half freakin microwaved, Dominos has the dirtiest kitchens on record and as a real fucking sandwich artist, I’m insulted by the proposition of Subway as a meal choice. A sandwich is not a meal, no matter how much fat they can cram into those rolls without it even being meat.

Sure, they found brains and guts in someone’s Secret Recipe meal… not mine. Sure, their chickens are mutant freaks, makes it easier for me to lack sympathy. Sure, the 11 secret herbs and spices malarkey is a smokescreen for salt, pepper, MSG and the sweat of underpaid and overworked chefs. But I’m a smoker. Smoker’s mentality. I’ll give up when it kills me.

YOU NEVER GIVE UP A GOOD THING UNTIL IT KILLS YOU, THERE’S TOO LITTLE JOY AS IT IS!

Besides, stay off the diet brand name soft drinks and you’ll actually live longer than the average customer.

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Random, I know, but fucking sue me fuckheads!

I guess one of the reasons I’m so ranty, besides living in one of the shittest countries of the 21st Century, is that I try to care about politics. And we all know of the two faced clusterfuck that are running this country (into the ground). If not, you just know I went ahead and drew you a picture, right?! Just in case…

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Honestly, you think this is a joke? I was being serious. I got a fair bit of disapproval for this. I don’t care. Someone has to take a stand against the two-faced winged serpent bastards. Might as well be the expendable people of society that nobody cares about. The good thing about that is they can’t make an example of me, I’m too unimportant, heehee.

Okay, I’m bored, suck on these and see ya later…

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Enternit Untelligence: July Sunstroke Special

I love summer… real summer, not the usual mid-months in the north of England where we get cold rain and wind while the rest of the world has heatwaves and goes to the beach to get their tits out (yeah, Jack Nicholson included, why not)!

I enjoy the weather – it’s great for adventure, barbecue and it’s also a good excuse for a cold beer, and when I can keep the majority of my better sensibilities about me, it’s entertaining to see how so many people can’t handle a bit of sun. Every year we get these crimewaves where the kids don’t stop screaming, the idiots get baked smoking weed on the street with no clothes on and police bombard the neighbourhood.

People in this cold country don’t know how to handle sun and hot weather. It’s a fact. They turn into hillbillies overnight. You can even spot the internet trolls when they’ve come out from under their bridges and into the sunlight for too long. Aaahhhh summer…

It’s such a beautiful day outside right now and yet I’m sat at this laptop again so I’ll make a quick one and then go get me some more sunshine and then go for tea, so without further nonsense from me:

ENTERNIT UNTELLIGENCE: The Sunstroke Special

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I’ll pass it on… to the men in white coats! You schizophrenic practical joker, you…

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Who is your enemy exactly? Your two year old daughter? You should find, with immature ADULT fuckfaces, that forgiving your enemies just gives them license to repeatedly fuck with you. It’s not annoying, nor is it boring to them, it’s actually fun fucking with people that don’t stick up for themselves.

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And I’d bust your fucking face open with it once you did.

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Please, don’t go back to work. Plenty of people deserve jobs and it’s insulting that you have a job and yet you don’t want it. Plus, I’d like to apply for such a job that wilfully employs idiots, easy money…

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Sure, blame it on the dad you don’t know rather than the mother that imposed her hatred of men on him from childhood, that’ll change the way they think you’re not worth a piss.

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Part-time people? A little reality and wisdom for you, Herr Ballbuster; anybody willing to give up their freedom for you must either be drugged, shy or agoraphobic to the point where they prefer you to hide behind rather than have the freedom to come and go as they please. What matters is that people can be trusted to come back because they like you. So, yeah, okay bye…

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Just keep biting your tongue there and hopefully it will come off!

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Yeah because… oh wait… it’s too late, you already posted this drivel to my News Feed. Never mind, there’s still time for me to delete you before you bore me to death. And about that birthday party you invited me to… maybe next time…

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That’s funny because my left hand itches when I get annoyed and my right hand is itching to FUCKING SLAP YOU ACROSS THE MOUTH!!!

Chase the Sunset: A Vampire Western

>>>CLICK HERE FOR LINK<<<

The intended version of my original guitar piece, Chase the Sunset is an idea I have for a modern western horror story. A long distance trucker’s life is turned upside down when he happens upon a roving band of savage biker vampires and is infected. Saved once by daylight, left for dead and cured of the vampire disease, he is left plagued with nightmares of his attackers’ other victims as they die, until he is forced to seek and destroy them himself. In a race against time, he charges into the night in the hopes of stopping their reign of terror throughout the Nevada desert, not knowing if he will see the next sunrise!

The composition consists of simple desert ambience and 80’s style synth, reminding me of an old Kathryn Bigelow film, Near Dark. From there, western style finger picking acoustic guitars kick in and become the main focus but not without a spooky overture of flutes inspired by Michael Kamen’s work with Queen and Metallica. It’s fantastical and every so slightly creepy but I’m mostly happy with it coming across as a story theme as opposed to a shock-horror kind of score!

Enternit Untelligence: Life Advice from the Least Qualified

Herro!!!

Who hates “Reality TV”? Who still watches it, just to hate it more?

I never was a fan. Mostly because if there’s anyone qualified to bring us reality, it sure as Jesus-Fuck isn’t the people that make these shows or the contestants, desperate to find fame and fortune for being idiots in front of a TV camera!

And as another Enternit Untelligence rolls around, I am reminded that the very people who enjoy that shit are probably the very same underpants gnomes that make Memes for no apparent reason but to look wise and clever. All I can say is that it discomforts me that I am outnumbered by people that like to wash their faces with steaming bullshit and call it soap.

Ehhhhrrrrr…

This week’s offerings:

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Sure, seems legit, right? I mean it would seem really ideal if we were in a relationship and I could tell you that you annoyed me to the point where I wanted to slap the sour taste of paranoia out of your mouth. But you’re also implying that you’ve been in a relatiosnhip where somebody didn’t want you to tell them YOUR secrets. It goes like this, sometimes, people are frail and weak and need to be protected from the truth because when they find shit out that doesn’t matter, they go all batshit loony. Fine, if it’s about cheating or having murdered someone and buried them in the garden, but it’s just as naive NOT to trust someone as it is for someone to TRUST the WRONG people. So a true relationship is one where you’re not being abused or about to be pushing your own favourite daisies!

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That’s a lot of God taking credit for you being ignorant and leaving your life in the hands of everyday life. You know, if there is a god, I’m starting to wonder if he has a zoo where clever people go to throw you bread and seeds. Try this for a week instead and see how it changes your circumstances:

Happy moments, pay them forward. Difficult moments, deal with them. Quiet moments, SHUT THE FUCK UP! Painful moments, learn from them. Every moment, FUCKING SHUT THE FUCK UP ALREADY!!!

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Life doesn’t test you, society tests you. You fall in line and pay your way one way or the other or you fall out of line, corrupt, rot and die, because society has no place for you if you don’t want to contribute anymore. Again, life doesn’t test you, life isn’t a sentient being, it’s a collective of them living by a system created by people that have their own choices to make. Reverse psychology is not only stupid, it’s dangerously irresponsible. Livelifehappy.com should know better than to dish out such empty words!

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Umbrella can make me stand in the rain? No it can’t! It has no authority over me. I don’t have to stand in the rain. What does that even have to do with confidence or success? I can successfully stand in rain without umbrella. How about ‘I love lamp, it can’t stop it being nighttime but it can help me to see keyboard a bit better!’

And confidence doesn’t give the power to face challenges, it just fools you into better thinking you can succeed at them. Maybe you can but that doesn’t stop this being really fucking pointless. Notice Emma Watson has an umbrella and it’s barely even spitting rain. YOU’RE FUCKING WITH ME, MEME!!!

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There is ONE type of people in this world, and they all want to be different. If you try to make a difference, you are wilfully creating rivalry. How about; do what the fuck you want to do, but don’t expect me to pay bail. If you want to do the right thing and if you want to change things for the better, you have to realise that what’s best for one person is sometimes what’s worst for others.

And then you have the law of averages. Stand at the end of a line of charity collectors in the middle of town and see how many people want to take notice of you after they’ve already given what they can or want to someone else. Making a difference involves fucking people over, even if they’re the people that helped you to get where you are.

Making a difference is starting a fight, kinda like the Crusades, kinda like Equal Rights. If you want it, you have to fight for it. But don’t accuse 50% of the world’s population of being defeatist by default.

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Forgiving people that have hurt you? Hurt you how? Nothing is specific here. Did they say something that hurt your feelings or was it full on slander? Did they randomly punch you in your vagina and then run away or was it a full on beating? Either way, are you a total pussy or actually damaged goods? I don’t know who the intended audience is here. If they’re the former, why feel the need to forgive? Are you really that special? If you’re the latter, why would you forgive anyone? Anyone sick enough to cause real grief isn’t asking for forgiveness unless they fear punishment.

And you never forget the people that “hurt” you, unless you’re dumb enough to really think and feel you can trust them!

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It takes time and experience to know your place and you can’t be honest with your “real feelings” unless you have the words and the courage for them. Aware WITH their place? So, so long as we all know our place, we won’t get hurt? Like if I didn’t try to raise my standards and live a better quality of life, i won’t be disappointed? Do you feel I don’t belong? Jesus Christ, wisdom from the Elitist right here (or from someone that failed English Language who thinks they’re better than everyone else)!

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Tell them to their faces…

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You clearly are one of them…

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Vague, very vague, and aimless! Pain is part of life, sometimes overly; a massive part of life. It doesn’t shape us the same as love and laughter, though. It’s the by-product of no love and no laughter or having been deprived of either by hate or/and sadness. Get your arse kicked royally and live with it. Learn how to get over it, but never hang on for your dear life to the point where your fingrnails are bearing your weight whn no one cares. That’s just stupid. Just let go and go do something else. Don’t waste time with people who don’t care. Approval is for children!

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I heartily agree… but that would depend WHEN exactly. When children are dependent on you? When you’d rather have money over respect? When you don’t want to be punished for a crime when you diminished all your responsibilities? Way to go, Meme Shit Sandwich, for suggesting every other Tom, Dick and Harry clear their conscience, regardless of what they did?

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I had to put this in here because I love it so much… hehehe… Speaks volumes!

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Oh you mean that dream we all have of a life that would actually make us happy? I mean if you’re trying to say that everybody is delusional, I’d be inclined to agree by about 20% generally (80% when watching ITV). But take a moment to think about what you wrote here, whoever you are. You’re forgetting that people learn to be better at getting and keeping what they want by making mistakes, learning from them and coming back from them. You’re implying that people are incapable of rational thought, or learning, and you sir/madam, are a fucktard for assuming so arrogantly. Dreams may change over time, but the context always comes back home in the end, when you get the opportunity to make it right. But this is what motivates us in life. And that is why people that dont dream are dead inside… LIKE YOU!!!

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I actually don’t know if this is a really successful troll or an actual strong independent black woman who don’t need no man because she will always have the McDonalds down the street. I didn’t retweet this, just so you know, but DAYUMN GUUURRRL!!!

There is absolutely fuck all wrong with knowing what you are, so long as you don’t suggest that everybody else is weak in comparison. Those is FIGHTIN WUUURRRRDS YAAAWWWLLLL!!!

Me, I’m a “tired old survivor in the body of a thirty three year old man that has seen more violence and suffered more phsyical and mental trauma than a great deal of young armed forces personnel that have been to Afghanistan and yet I don’t go around saying it. I also live with my mother because I’m gradually coming back strong from repetetive long-term Depression and Anxiety that was actualy classed as being as close to Post Traumatic Stress as was possible, and therefore nobody will pay me to work. I don’t need no bitchezzz but I can appreciate them and I wish I was as mentally healthy/as ignorant as some others so that bad things in this world wouldn’t bother me so much, but hey, that’s not your problem and I’m not saying that I’m better or stronger than any of you in any way, I guess I’m just saying…”

AINT NOBODY GOT TIME FOR DAT!

You want a Class War?

Take a good look at this cuntface…

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If you were sitting in the same room and it happened to be you she was looking at, what do you suppose the conversation would entail?

Meet celebrity psychopath Katie Hopkins. This is not a “bad photograph”, she really does have a face like a smacked arse and she really is a horrid snob. I’m venting here, so get ready for some pretty nasty language, as I’ll be fucked if you think I’m going to censor myself once I’m done.

As people all over the world are aware, reality television once revolutionised the face of entertainment and even boosted some industries, if you ever watched shows like ‘Dragon’s Den’ or ‘The Apprentice’. It also uncovered the nasty fucking truth about how desperate people really are for fame and fortune; showing us that despite the fact that the public are largely decent people that have standards, power trips and bullying and disgusting behaviour make for good ratings, which television corporations like.

Mary Whitehouse is with the worms, we are no longer a nation (the UK) that cares by large about swearing, nudity or violence so long as it’s thrown together intelligently in fictional works. But reality television is not the place to be a total cunt. Well that’s what I thought, but despite the efforts of OFCOM, you can moan and bitch about poor ethics but you can’t stop the money being made. And according to alleged-paedophile publicity guru Max Clifford, “all publicity is good publicity!”

A quick rundown on who Katie thinks she is and in fact what she is

Hopkins is a media whore and apparent journalist who likes to bitch and whine about society from the standpoint that she is a successful businesswoman despite the truth that she has gotten to where she is today by cheating and belittling others to get ahead in life. Ahead in life meaning making lots of money and being able to look down her nose at others from a seemingly very high horse.

A high horse that probably wouldn’t have been possible without dumping her boyfriend for her manager in 2001, then fucking another of her managers behind her husband’s back.

She first slithered into the limelight in 2007 in search of fame and a £100,000 a year job here…

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But quit under pressure because she had bullied her way into a corner and couldn’t get out again. This didn’t stop her from believing that controversy was the quickest way to success and she has appeared on other shows such as ‘I’m a Celebrity…’ and ‘Question Time’ which is funny. ‘I’m a Celebrity…’ being a reality show and ‘Question Time’ being a debate show, her views on reality are nothing but debatable (fucking despicable also).

She is known for her controversial views/discriminations against anybody that doesn’t live her high and mighty lifestyle and yet television hosts seem to get a kick out of her, lumping them in the same category. ‘Pricks I will never know or care to know!’ Which is pretty useful to me because they’ve been saying the same about the likes of me for a lot longer. Me and arrogant fucks like them don’t mix and never will except when they need people like me to make their money for them.

She comes from a long line of offensive, out of touch snobs that busy themselves with criticising others because that’s what they get paid to do. And I don’t know her parents, but I’m taking a wild guess that her dad looks like this…

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I’m also taking a random shout to suggest that this is the type of guy she’s fucking behind her husband’s back whenever the controversial celebrity news headlines gets her wet!

Why do I hate her so much?

I was perfectly happy forgetting her blank eyes, Aryan blonde hair pinned up like an insolent snob schoolgirl, ski-slope nose and smacked-arse-red face. That was until she reared her ugly-as-sin face on ‘Good Morning’ and apparently, she can’t stay off that show. I mean for fuck’s sake, where’s the appeal?

Is it media saturation? Is she being paid to do this or is she the one paying the studio to let her in? Is she fucking the boss?

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Click the pic to see the clip and please stay til the end to see the lovely Holly Willoughby tell her to shut the fuck up!

Once again, Cunty (sick of her name, this one’s more apt) Pigface decides to go on television to dictate to the nation that she hates the lower classes, that society isn’t good enough for her children and that she JUDGE’S CHILDREN BY THEIR NAMES!!!

YOU SAD BITCH!

A quick recap of Philip Schofield’s reaction…

ARE YOU FUCKING SERIOUS???

ARE YOU FUCKING SERIOUS???

My own personal views? I wouldn’t give a child a surname for a first name for the simple reason that there will never be another Harrison Ford. I wouldn’t name a child after a country either, especially a white child named INDIA!

Regional town names work well on some people. Preston works for some. I bet you know a few Chelseas, too, don’t you (since you want to play the name and class game). You have to realise – Piggy, yes you – that children grow into their names and they sure as fuck don’t grow into your elitist views on how untrustworthy they are, unless you would sooner have them in a cage, then I condone that child’s desire to rip your face off like a caged animal would.

Chardonnay was a bit ridiculous, I must admit. Was it a ruse to make Pigface seem less extreme? Possibly, but that’s about as pointless as a prick on a pope! Personally, because I don’t have children or count on having any, EVER!!! I take other peoples’ harmless choices lightly and don’t assume control of their decisions or desires to make them. I just hope there isn’t a child out there named Lambrini or Skol Super.

This bitch shouldn’t be spreading her views on television, she is an offensive elitist that is all too open about the fact that she would like to recreate the Holocaust to sterilise the gene pool so that her class can inbreed at will (like they every leave the mansion let alone the fucking high street).

But that’s the problem, right? How many millions of people in this country have no problem keeping their affairs to themselves, how many mothers and fathers don’t judge a book by it’s cover, and yet YOU go on television to be seen and heard blabbering and rolling your eyes at us because you’d rather not have to mix with us at all. It makes me realise…

The Bitch really does want a Class War!

Well you picked a fine time to kick the country in its teeth and I suppose you think you were pretty brave…

No!!!

The pricks that are running the country right now have taken all that we have and handed it to people like you – people that do NOT WORK FOR A LIVING but rather order others around for a wage that frankly begs beyond belief – in a nice big corporate tax break, while we’ve been the ones forced into austerity to make up for the mess that PEOPLE LIKE YOU make in your gambling businesses.

You want to separate the classes? You’ve succeeded. Over the last few years, PEOPLE LIKE YOU dismembered the Middle Class and forced half of them to make sacrifices, ending up where the Minimum Wagers were three to four years ago WHEN WE HAD IT GOOD. Now the classes are so vaguely separated that nobody has a clue what they’re supposed to be, and that’s how you probably like it because it hides the fact that we as a country are well and truly fucked. But to divide this way does not mean to conquer. You clearly want to be hated and hated you will be.

You sit pretty on your money piles (money probably not the only piles you have) and point the finger at people and judge them for not having the incentive or motivation to be a horrid, scarcastic, sociopathic, bullying, scum-fucking, corporate cock-sucking, motherfucking, cheating cunt.

And we know that your money is not YOUR money. Call yourself a businesswoman? Take a look across the pond at that “100 Million Dollar Whale”, Paula Deen and her personal views and how it’s taken away her opportunities. Those don’t grow on trees, they grow on the people whose money affords them their power, and I don’t think you can run a business and be such a hypocritical and judgemental sack of shit at the same time.

I think you’re on borrowed time. I think you’re about to be left high and dry and that you are getting ready to jump from one husband to the other like NO LOWER CLASS MOTHER DID TO STAY RICH AND BRATTY AND SPOILED, EVER!!!

If you want a class war, you are massively and critically unprepared. You class us as unintelligent and you think we’re animals. For many, you are right. We could just sit back and look the other way, totally unaware that a gang of jobless thugs are rearranging your life until it shows up on ‘Good Morning’ in a five minute newsflash that says TOLD YOU SO!!!

But what would you do if your reputation left you hopeless and without a chance everywhere you looked? I hope you have enough money to never have to leave your house(s) for long periods of time, because with an unforgettable face like yours and not to forget your sick attitude, you would find it very hard to get a job in the real world.

People like us are refused opportunities daily by people like you for lesser excuses than the bullshit you expect us to swallow.

Do us all a favour, Cunty Pigface, and either keep your mouth shut and your face under a paper bag, or fuck off somewhere we don’t have to ever care about what you think!!!

Escape From DC

>>> Escape From DC <<< CLICK LINK HERE

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I’ve never been one to share music here but why the hell not?! This should sound familiar if you saw either of John Capenter’s Snake Plissken films – Escape from New York/LA – as it is my variation of the theme music. I call it Escape from DC because I wanted to imagine what a final instalment of a trilogy would come to.

In the first film, Snake was sent over the walls into New York to rescue the president, whose plane had crashed in the prison state. He rescues the president but as a thanks for the people threatening to kill him if he didn’t take the job, and for the people that died trying to escape, he sets world chaos in motion.

In Escape from LA, he is also sent into LA to rescue a rabidly religious and deluded new president’s daughter and when they double cross him and attempt to murder him, he tricks them and uses a device to destroy all global technology.

For the opening ambience of my variation, the same deluded and dangerous US government wages war on its own people and it is Washington that has walled itself in as the military faces off against the public. All hell comes crashing down and Snake growls, ‘welcome to the human race…’

I imagine this would be the culmination of a trilogy had there been one; Snake going over the wall once more, only this time the people he’s rescuing are all over the country. This time there are no ultimatums but he does face his most dangerous foe yet and the chances of his survival would be slim to nil.

I hope you enjoy listening, thank you!